As tech culture becomes increasingly prevalent, more and more women in the San Francisco Bay Area find themselves dating men in the technology business, or ‘techies.’ Many women have begun to notice some common trends among men in tech. From the surface, dating a tech guy seems appealing because he’s smart, has a high salary, and has good job flexibility. However, after getting to know their techie a little better, many women found that the guys fell into one of two categories: the ultimate nerd or a brogrammer. Nerds were too closed off, socially awkward, and busy doing their own work, while brogrammers were the opposite. Urban Dictionary defines a brogrammer as “a programmer who breaks the usual expectations of quiet nerdiness and opts instead for the usual trappings of a frat-boy: popped collars, bad beer, and calling everybody “bro.” Despised by everyone, especially other programmers.” Both ends of the spectrum upset women because it meant that they would either not have a very good emotional connection with their man, or their man may not be very serious or faithful.
I have personally had a little bit of experience dating guys in tech over the past year. Although I have definitely met some people that did fall into the category of brogrammer or ultimate nerd, there are many exceptions to the rule. Even though stereotypes exist, tech has developed into a huge industry with people from different backgrounds and cultures. Men, women, and transgendered people all work in the industry and can be called “techies”. It is hard to make generalizations on the personality types within the tech industry. There are many exceptions to every stereotype, so it is probably best to stay open-minded when dating a “techie”.